Grace from a child’s eyes is one thing that I don’t ever want to stop observing. Ava Kate lives life giving grace, especially for her sister. Now, granted she has her strong willed and head strong days and those days make me want to pull my hair out. However, when it comes to grace being given, she does this so well. On days that are hard, I just have to sit back and observe her sometimes to remember God is doing work in her. It brings to mind Philippians 1:6 (TPT)
6 I PRAY WITH GREAT FAITH FOR YOU, BECAUSE I’M FULLY CONVINCED THAT THE ONE WHO BEGAN THIS GLORIOUS WORK IN YOU WILL FAITHFULLY CONTINUE THE PROCESS OF MATURING YOU AND WILL PUT HIS FINISHING TOUCHES TO IT UNTIL THE UNVEILING OF OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST!
Philippians 1:6 (TPT)
We are all a “work in progress” of God’s great work. This goes for our children as well. So we as adults should give them grace on their bad days just as they give us grace on our bad ones too.
I look at the love Ava Kate has for her little sister. It’s amazing. She gives Claire so much GRACE.
We have always been open with Ava Kate about Claire, her development, and how she thinks differently or learns differently. But we have always stressed Claire is still smart and bright for who she is and will learn at her own pace. We also have built both of their personal worth up, never discrediting Claire because of her disability.
I hope Ava Kate continues to see that in people from how we are raising her with her special needs sister. To treat her no differently. Just because we have differences it does not make the other person any less worthy. We all have value in God’s eyes and we teach them they each have equal value in ours as well.
I hope our children never feel like they have to guard their feelings and emotions. I hope they will continue to learn that we never want them to be fearful of expressing themselves. We also want them to talk with us openly and candidly. Ava Kate has always been great about asking questions about Claire and why she does certain things. We never discourage that curiosity and learning about her sister. She too can become an advocate for her and others with disabilities by knowing the differences in their lifestyle versus hers. But also seeing how differences makes us all unique and beautiful!
Grace and Mistakes
The most visible area that I see Ava Kate give grace to others is in their mistakes. We see this probably daily with Claire and her. I can’t even count how many times Claire has taken a toy, chunked something and it went flying at Ava Kate’s head, pulled her hair, broken a toy…etc.
Every single time Ava Kate never lashes back, never yells at her sister or even tries to reprimand her. She is very forgiving. I can see in Ava Kate’s eyes that her feelings are hurt, but she still gives grace even though Claire may not fully deserve. The same way our heavenly father does for us. Man can we learn something from that!
Ava Kate will even sit with Claire and try to explain that what she just did wasn’t good. (In her high pitched sweet sister voice!) She will take the time to explain what she should have done, even though Claire may not know what she is talking about! It’s the point that she slows down and realizes it was a mistake.
There are times that Ava Kate is so frustrated and she will say things to me like “Why can’t she behave like a normal 4 year old?” or “Why does she have to do that?” But for me, I see this as a teaching opportunity about Claire and the disabilities she has and how her learning process is different then some. It’s an opportunity to teach about giving grace to people and being kind and compassionate.
This got me thinking more about kindness and compassion.
inclusion can be seen
I remember when we got home from the hospital and I was going back to work. My principal and I had a conversation about Claire. I told him, “I am just so worried about how kids will treat her when she gets older. Kids are so mean.”
He is great about finding a positive in everything, as I am too usually, but this was hard for me to see. He reminded me of our special needs students we have on campus. How so many of our regular students treat them with kindness and compassion. They include them and protect them from the “mean” kids. Yes, there will be those ones out there that exclude, but many and most INCLUDE!
As we get older we have to work harder on these things like inclusion and acceptance. Being compassionate when we don’t want to, forgiveness and grace. I think due to the innocence of a child these things can come easy. They haven’t been corrupted by the things that can dampen your spirit just yet. They still have the love for those around you and don’t understand what judgment is yet. It’s sweet to actually think about.
I think this is why the bible states so much about changing to become more like a child. In Matthew 15:3 the bible states,
“I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”
There you have it…we must see life through a child’s eyes and become more like them. This is the key to getting into the big pearly gates!
We need to remember to all give more grace, have a bigger heart, judge less, and have compassion for all, just as a child does.
